Problem:

With the many changes teens go through there is bound to be struggles that occur along the way. For some, these struggles take the form of an overactive mind, a mind that never seems to stop thinking. This stream of thoughts can cause worry, fear, and avoidance. The thought process goes something like this..."I hope 5 hours is enough time studying for my Spanish test on Monday. But what if it isn't and I fail? If I fail, my GPA will be horrible and I won't be accepted to good colleges. I won't get a good job and all my future plans will be ruined." As you might imagine, this process causes inordinate stress that frequently leads to feelings of anxiety and overwhelm. Frequently teens feel a mixture of anxiety and depression as both are related to prominent negative thoughts that affect how they feel and behave.

Symptoms:

• Excessive worry about daily life events
• Trouble concentrating
• Elevated heart rate when in stressful situations
• Fear of leaving their home or being away from their parent of caregiver
• Lightheadedness when in stressful situations
• Irritable and easily angered/frustrated
• Chronic worry (being late, completing homework, making mistakes, things going wrong)
• School avoidance and/or refusal
• Trouble falling asleep and staying asleep
• Need for things to be order "perfect" or "just right"
• Refusal to participate in social activities (parties, team sports, class presentations)
• Physical complaints (stomachaches, headaches, fatigue, muscle tension/aches)
• Always expecting and over-exaggerating the worst case scenario
• Overly sensitive and cries easily

How We Help:

Because anxiety is a problem of an overactive mind that assumes negative future outcomes, we help teens refocus their thoughts and feelings on today, the present. Our philosophy is "live by what you know not what you fear". This helps teens ground themselves in the reality of past experiences that did not end with great loss or horrible catastrophe. Teens will learn to identify negative distorted thoughts that cause their fear as well as develop healthy coping skills that promote self-confidence, mood stabilization, and a "quiet mind". Practical, effective, and proven therapeutic approaches such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Mindfulness training, and Exposure Therapy, help teens think, feel, and live better.

Problem:

For many teens, making friends and feeling social confident does not come easy. Teenage alienation can be a very lonely and painful experience that can often result in sadness, anxiety, and withdrawal. Some teens struggle with social pragmatics (eye contact, social context decoding, reading non-verbal social cues, lack of social reciprocity) while others may feel anxious or reluctant to socially engage for fear of being rejected. Teens that experience social struggles are more susceptible to peer pressure and are at higher risk for joining unhealthy peer groups that accept others based on their willingness to “party". For some teens, video games become the default/only past time, hampering the potential for positive social experiences or relationships.

Symptoms:

How We Help:

We work from a very structured and active model when helping teens work on their specific social challenge. Teens experiencing social anxiety will learn to build their social confidence in small ways to begin experiencing success and a newfound sense of hope. The cycle of negative thoughts, feelings, and behavior is explored giving teens stronger insight and specific coping strategies that will encourage greater social confidence. For teens that struggle with more fundamental social skills, therapy not only works to bolster emotional and behavioral functioning but also takes on a more practical approach focusing on positive social mechanics. Greeting others with strong eye contact and a handshake; verbalizing interest in others lives; developing a greater understanding of how others feel and responding appropriately; and identifying and responding to social nuances and subtleties are focused on to help teens experience greater social success.

Problem:

As children move into adolescence they begin to express and assert their thoughts, feelings, and opinions more frequently. Expressing personal perspectives, thoughts, feelings, and ideas is healthy and should be encouraged by parents as long as it’s done appropriately. For some teens however, opposition becomes a default reflex that incites conflict and strife. Rules and boundaries are not respected and often crossed with little regard for consequences. Defiant teens often feel a sense of entitlement and are acutely self-centered with very little consideration for others. This dynamic makes it difficult for them to take personal responsibility, instead opting to deflect blame onto others. Defiant teens are at greater risk for substance use and behavioral problems in their community.

Symptoms:

• Angry outbursts (slamming doors, punching walls, throwing things)
• Chronic arguing with adults/authority figures
• Frequently angry and resentful
• Refuses to follow rules
• Blaming others/no personal responsibility
• Unwilling to be flexible or compromise
• Blatant repeated disobedience
• Deliberate attempts to annoy others
• Spiteful or vindictive

How We Help:

In most cases, just getting your defiant teen to therapy is an accomplishment. We are sensitive to teen issues and as a result of many years of experience and training, we relate to teens at their level. They are likely expecting another adult who will admonish them; not take the time to understand their perspective; and who will immediately align with their parents. They have very little insight into their behavior and see their problems coming from their parents, teachers, and society who all impose rules they do not agree with or understand. We spend time with teens helping them disengage from power struggles with others and learn that "swimming against the current" is exhausting and unproductive. We uncover family dynamics that polarize teens and their parents while helping to strengthen flexibility, respect, and bonding.
Additionally, our defiant teen clients learn to improve emotional awareness; identify triggers that cause impulsive reactivity; regulate emotions of frustration and anger; express their thoughts/feelings respectfully; and employ daily coping skills preventatively to avoid conflict. In family therapy, parents and their teen develop and practice conflict resolution skills, communication skills, and healthy emotional coping that foster behavioral, social, and emotional maturity.

Problem:

Adolescence is a difficult time in life as social, emotional, behavioral, physiological and interpersonal development all seem to intensely converge. As a result, you would expect some difficulty adjusting to so many changes. Academic pressure, managing strong feelings, resolving conflict, and finding social acceptance are expected to cause some stress which most teens move through with mild to moderate difficulty. Some teens however can become emotionally fatigued from one or more developmental challenges. Environmental stress such as: divorce, a recent move, a death, or teen-parent conflict can either cause or contribute to teen depression. Because most teens have not encountered depression before, they do not have adaptive and healthy coping skills in place. This puts them at a higher risk for substance use, taking chances that could result in self-harm, and/or overt and purposeful acts of self-harm i.e. cutting, suicide.

Symptoms:

• Withdrawal from family and friends
• Sadness and feelings of hopelessness
• Sleep problems: not being able to sleep at night and sleeping all day
• Academic decline
• Apathy
• Loss of appetite (weight loss) or compulsive overeating (weight gain)
• Trouble concentrating and forgetful
• Tearfulness being emotionally “fragile”
• Loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed
• Fatigue or lack of energy
• Excessive feelings of guilt
• Frequent headaches or stomach aches
• Irritability or angry

How We Help:

Depressed teens need a great deal of empathy, reassurance, and encouragement as we work diligently to evaluate their depression and provide services that will address their immediate needs. Safety is our first concern and we actively assess and help to remediate any safety issues. Safety plans are discussed and developed with parents and their teen. We help to identify causes and explore solutions to environmental stressors to assist with mood stabilization. Because depression is a negative cycle of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors we use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to help teens reduce distorted thoughts that cause sadness, self-doubt, and withdrawal.

Small, attainable, daily goals are set to help teens restructure their thoughts from self-defeating, “Nothing’s going to change no matter how hard I try” to more realistic, balanced, and hopeful thought process, “I am responsible for today only and these are the things I can do to have a good day....”. We help teens create daily structure so that they are keeping their minds and body active through adaptive coping and healthy skill building behavior. Symptom tracking and progress is evaluated frequently to ensure your teen is thinking, feeling, and living better.

Problem:

Parents of a teen that is unmotivated often express feelings of frustration, anxiety, and fear for their teen’s future. Parents talk to their teens about having a strong work ethic, the competition in our employment climate, and the need to be driven for success. Some teens respond by nodding compliantly as they endure yet another “parent lecture” while others become defensive deflecting blame onto others. You're left feeling exhasperated as they resume playing Xbox and the cycle repeats in a week or two. Parents often ask the rhetorical question “Wouldn’t it be easier to just put forth more effort to avoid all the stress associated with being lazy?” More effort seems like an obvious answer assuming the problem is simply laziness or an allergy to hard work. For many, it is not that simple as laziness is often a symptom of something deeper.

Causes:

• Learning Difficulties: ADHD, auditory processing, dyslexia, and other more covert problems can result in withdrawal, low mood, and a negative self-esteem.
• Emotional Difficulties: past or present social alienation (being bullied), generalized anxiety or social phobia, depression.
• Laziness is really avoidant behavior – a coping response based on pain associated with trying and failing repeatedly despite their best efforts. Teens learn to innately withdraw adopting a more reluctant philosophy of “nothing ventured, nothing lost”. Teens become risk aversive as a way to protect against assumed failure.
• Family Stress: parenting inconsistencies, divorce, loss, and a recent move can affect mood causing withdrawal, sadness and general apathy.
• Many teens find it hard to motivate intrinsically (for their own personal pride and success) vs. extrinsically (for their parent’s pride and praise). Working hard based on their parent’s value system usually falls flat. Teens find success when they begin to see the value in hard work – a critical component of successful individuation.
• Parental Enabling: Overindulged children and teens can develop a skewed view of life, which contributes to their sense of entitlement. If they are raised whereby things come easy, they naturally expect more of the same, as they grow older. Defiance and anger often accompany malaise and a lack of motivation.

How We Help:

We work to uncover deeper causes for motivational issues so that the problem is resolved at its source. Treatment goals are developed and a specific plan is set in place to encourage feelings of control, competence, and success. These feelings help to motivate effort, support stronger outcomes for success, and ultimately establish new cycles of positive functioning. Our job is to help your “diamond in the rough” feel confident, motivated, and brilliantly shine.